10 things about Indore’s traffic I love to hate

India is a special place. There may be hundreds of things which one likes about their hometown. But traffic ain’t one of them. They always reserve the choicest and wincing-at-it-is-too-late words for their beloved city’s traffic… it doesn’t matter if that place’s traffic is actually good.

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I think this gentleman, riding in the BRTS, wants to reach the destination before his bike.

So why should I be any different. My hometown, Indore, has the worst traffic and people with pathetic and weird traffic sense.

It is said that if you drive there following all the traffic rules, either one of the two things could happen — either you won’t reach your destination at all, or you might reach the hospital first.

If you are out on a drive in Indore, here are a few things of which you should take a print-out, carry in your wallet and read whenever you find free time (preferably with a beaded necklace in your hand):

1. There is only one traffic rule in Indore…there are no rules! (sorry Brad Pitt, but this sentence is kinda relevant here)

2. Lanes are for people who are driving a bulldozer. Rest is free for all.

3. There is no bhed-bhav on Indori roads. A cycle wala can occupy a fast lane with just as much haq as a BMW wala.

4. Footpaths are extremely essential for good flow of traffic. Where else would the tea stall and pohe wala thela go.

5. There is absolutely no need for you to bother with 20th century traffic customs like giving indicator before you turn. They are just ornamental lights on your vehicle.

6. You must stop your vehicle at least 50 metres after a zebra crossing at a traffic signal.

7. The time indicator of all traffic signals are a bit slow. So it’s okay to start 5 seconds before the signal turns green, and okay to stop 10 seconds after it has turned red.

8. Do not make fun of traffic policemen. Salute them for spending so much time in dust and pollution because it takes guts to stand and gaze at the vehicles. The only time they will punish you for breaking any rules is when they have to meet their challan’s annual target.

9. If someone behind you shouts “aage badhaou“, take it as a signal and just MOVE. For the sake of your mother’s and sister’s happy life, DO NOT turn back to see who shouted and why. In all cases it would be the conductor of a public transport vehicle, dangling out of the door defying laws of gravity.

10. “Horn All The Time Please” is the unwritten rule. If you are not horny enough (yes offense), then why did your parents even think of giving you the keys to the car/bike/cycle.

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28 thoughts on “10 things about Indore’s traffic I love to hate

      1. Loved all your posts about India Annet. At least the ones which I read just now. It’s 2 am and though I want to continue reading, I think I should leave something for tomorrow as well. Just one question… while you were in Ahmedabad, did they call you “Annet Ben”? 😛

      2. In Gujarat, all women are addressed as “ben”, meaning sister, and guys as “bhai” (brother). So I would be Anamika ben and say Modi, he will be Narendra bhai. 🙂 Of course these days young girls don’t like being called ben (which is a gujarati-sised version of the actual word – behen).

      3. That is super interesting. Have you lived or are you from Gujarat? Husband and architecture students were at CEPT. You need to sleep . I am thrilled you found me!

  1. Thank you for visiting my blog. I’m from Bangalore, and I assure you…it’s the exact same. I love your writing style, it really tickles 😀

    I’m going to be an avid follower ! 😀

    1. Well I have lived in Bangalore for a year and I know what you mean. I feel one-way roads are the most irritating aspect there. But I am trying to recall my time there as hard as I can, and still Indore (Hyderabad is a close second) seem to be the worst possible places to drive in.

      1. Wow, that must be bad then.

        Actually, I’m in 12th grade and I was considering the IIMI indergrad programme- IPM. Do you have any idea if its any good ? I really have no clue whom to ask, so…

    1. Absolutely, different cities keep adding different dimensions to it. For example, in Pune, autorickshaw guys would just point their toes in the direction they want to turn. One just needs to be extremely alert to see this ‘indicator’. 😀

  2. Anamika.. I LOVE Indore’s traffic.

    In fact I miss it sometimes here in Bangalore. There is this pleasure of cutting lanes, and driving with no rules that I could never have in the US.

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